Wednesday 19 August 2009

Her first time

She wanted to do it. All her friends had. This was the right time. The right day. She just had to find someone to do it with. She looked around. He held her gaze. He had been watching her for a while. In the strangers eyes she saw understanding. Walking up to him, she asked if he would. Without missing a beat he answered in the affirmative. He took her hand and led the way. A cold chill running down her spine, her heart dancing to a different beat, she wondered if she was making a big mistake. A part of her told her not to go ahead with it. The stronger one told her that she had to, someday. Might as well be now.

They were finally there. He looked at her, he read her thoughts. The stranger did. ‘Scared?’ he asked almost smiling. She nodded. ‘Terrified’. They did not speak for a while, and then he placed his hand on her cold one. She looked up at him and murmured, ‘I’ve never done this before. Have you?’ He laughed a full laugh and said ‘yes’. ‘Don’t worry’ he said. ‘Close your eyes, it helps. Just loosen up. Relax. It'll be over before you know it.’ She said nothing.


And when they embarked on the journey, together, a million emotions burst within her, screaming, wailing, eyes moistened, feeling sensations she had never felt before and finally she threw her head back and looked at the stranger. It was nothing like she imagined it to be. It was only better! He took her hand in his once again and smiling he asked, ‘Did you enjoy it?’ She shook her head tiredly. ‘Want to do it again?’ ‘Not now, maybe another day. I’m just glad I got it over with’. ‘I'm glad I could help’ said the stranger starting to walk away. ‘Do you think it sounds immature?’ She asked innocently. ‘Oh no, I get it’ He replied. ‘Roller coasters can be awfully creepy’.

41 comments:

♪♪HARINI♪♪ said...

LOL!!!!!!!!!
that was brilllllliant!!!!!!!!!!! i simply loved it!!!!!!

way to go, girl!! :)

pawan said...

Wow,
When comments poured up in your last post saying that the last sentences in your posts are excellent, I couldn't believe it. But God, it was semi porn, I mean you made me think like that, wonderful narration!
I was just wondering about what the the ending could be, but I didn't dream about roller coasters!

Great one!
Keep writing!

Btw, I have posted the sequel to my series, do check!

Bhel Puri & Seekh Kabab said...

LOL, nice one. I knew you would not go for the obvious ending, but I was kept guessing till the end. One suggestion - next time, you may want to drop in a few clues to tantalize (titillate?) your readers. Nicely done. :-)

Shravan | ശ്രവണ്‍ said...

haha that was great.. loved it and it made me wait till the last para to laugh.. was like.. omg great :) strager, she :P :P

Choco said...

Lolzzzz....Niicee:)

Bullshee said...

No! Hmpf! I didn't like it!

All the while, here I was, thinking that the guy was getting some, and feeling happy for him and it turns out to be some frumpy roller coaster!

When is the guy ACTUALLY going to get some? The world isn't fair!!! :-(

sawan said...

impressive!

u love to play with the world's imaginations, dont ya? :P

Shweta said...

ROTFL!
I knew you would have some fun thing at the end! Way to go! Great use of pun throughout.

Cheers!

Tomz said...

Felt as if walking on a piece of narrow linen tied across sleazy thoughts..but with the last sentence you gave me an amazing relief..

n i t i n said...

You get to imagine it in one scale... ;) And then to re-imagine it in 'nther. Wah! Chechi wah!

:)
had a really great read, you made me wait a lot though... :|

i bow down to thee... *awesomeness*

:P

Anyway, cheers sis...

-HM

Alen said...

:)
Now why did I c that coming...
Great writing

Gayathri said...

cool..brilliant to the last line..
btw,new name????met sunshine at last??

Mon Espace said...

@Harini: Danke!!

@Pawan: Semi porn? U really thought i'd write semi porn?! lol

@Bhel Puri: Tantalize. :)

@Shravan: Thanks & I haven't forgotten about ur tag, don't worry :)

@Choco: Long time..where you been?:)

@Bullshee: frumpy. lol! :D

@Sawan: don't we all ? ;)

@Shweta: Pun, sarcasm..cant get enough of..

@tomz: Hmm..that's the idea.

@nitin: Thanks kottayam boy :)

@Alen: You saw the roller coaster? :O mind reader *creeps* :P

@gayathri: met? as in person? no, not yet :)

sidish6 said...

I was thinkin abt bungee jumpin all along n it turn out itz roller coaster ;P

life is a roller coaster ;D

Vikram said...

To be very honest, I thought it was Bungee jumping !!!!!!!!!!!

ani_aset said...

hehehe feel like keeeeling you :P
that was awesome :D

sharath krishnaswami said...

everything but how the roller coaster really was! funny!
nice piece~!

Jyoti said...

Aahahaha. You're so good at this. Loved it.

Way to go girl! HI 5! ;)

Solo me said...

you being you, i knew it wasn't what you wanted me to think :p

but roller coaster idea was super duper kewl!!!

radiorocker said...

I thought there was something fishy goin on... i mean we guys never get so "lucky"... :P

Thousif Raza said...

and you tell guys are bad, lol, you describing the story in such a way......, ha ha, i am smiling all over......

nice one, a clever one, an awesome one, and i still gotta see you on the blog veda.....


take care and keep writing,

peter said...

"just that u know, it's not very common, it doesn't happen with everyone, and it is a big deal :P "

Ok i quoted this dialogue at the inappropriate place but
but
but ..but
.
.
I KNEW IT !

jaggu said...

Just absolutely cool..

But i didn kno that u wud have such gr8 sensations on a rollercoaster.. he he ,, lol

BloggerMouth said...

Sounds exactly like my "first time" :D Nicely done!

ZK said...

lol...you've added a lot more variety to your posts now :)

shradha said...

kudos to that nice li'l work!! :D totally had fun reading it through

RYAN VACHAS#9895389045 said...

great post ........all first times are worth remembering.....

Benny said...

he he..that was too teasing!!! really well disguised n narrated! first time here...impressive posts n template..will keep following! Cheers!!! Pls Do visit my blog @ www.itismyworldhere.blogspot.com.My blog has been nominated for d best blog award in short story sect.DO read my stories n if u find them intersting,do vote for me @ http://www.indiblogger.in/nominations.php?id=4
Thx !!!

Sriram said...

Haha it couldnt be the obvious but... a roller coaster ride?? LOL that was kickass!

Anjana said...

LOL! I knew something was not right! ;)

oRange* said...

oh my god!
ahahahaha ..that was one rocking post!

superrr :)

Zeba said...

Haha!! Nice.

sanely insane said...

i was debating between whether it would turn out to be a bungee jump or a roller coaster ride :)

sadly am still a virgin at both!!! :(

Shravan | ശ്രവണ്‍ said...

you have something to accept from here.

ScarletTd1ar1es said...

lol. :P damn u got me bigtym. :P
shit. unbelievable.

:: Pearly :: said...

AWESOME!

love it, following it! =)


cheers!


ps: random blog hopping led me here, i'm glad it did! :)

rame409 said...

woah!this was terrific...
fell upon your blog by accident...gr8 writing!
cheers!

Jinju said...

Hahaha....dat was just amazing vedz! gr8 wrk!!!

Prakhar said...

well....since you told me you wrote sumthin similar...i saw that comin..otherwise its an interestin read..neatly done i say! :D

Da Rodent said...

shyte.. :)

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